Sometimes I wish I knew how things would turn out before I committed to them. It certainly would make decision making a lot easier. Although in regards to running, I’m thankful I haven’t known. I definitely wouldn’t have signed up for the hand of cards I have been dealt.
In February of 2014 I was diagnosed with a navicular stress fracture in my left foot. It was discouraging, but I had experienced injury in my career before and knew I would bounce back. I took 6 months off and then began what felt like the slowest build back up of all time. I did all the rehab exercises, changed shoes, and even ran with a metronome to increase my cadence (bless my teammates for putting up with it). But if I’m honest with myself, my left ankle was always in the back of my mind.
People told me that navicular bone fractures often bother you for up to 18 months after injuring it, so I relied on the army of people around me to help manage the tightness. I seemed to be able to manage it so long as I only wore flats for workouts, did all the little things, and took days off. Fitness was coming around and I was hopeful my ankle would cooperate as well.
Then 2 weeks ago in one workout it went from feeling like it normally did to me waking the cool down. An MRI revealed that it was fractured again. While deep down I probably could have told you that, hearing the news from a doctor was like a punch in the stomach. It was the death of a dream that I had committed myself to for the last 2 years.
Seeing a dream die is not easy, especially when it is not on your terms. I cried so hard my abs were sore the next day (potential new ab exercise?). I bought myself a stuffed animal. And for the last week I have gone through the motions of life while feeling numb inside. But it will get better. Time will pass and this too will feel like a blip in the road, a deck of cards that I wouldn’t have chosen but were used to build character.